Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say

I had dinner with a friend and we were talking about personal challenges. Our conversation made me think about how so much of what we want and feel doesn't ever get communicated. Our birth families had a style of communication and we had to learn the internal language of that family in order to survive. But when we carry those habits of communication into the world, people don't always understand what we are trying to get across. The only way to be true to yourself and get your point across to others is to be 100% authentic. Don't say what you don't mean. Don't say what you think is socially acceptable to say when it isn't at all what you're feeling. When we judge our feelings before speaking we don't communicate the truth. If it's "bad" to feel "that" then we certainly aren't going to admit that we are feeling what we're feeling. We're often afraid of how others will react if we're honest. There's no guarantee that we'll get the kind of response that we're seeking but we might feel that we have said what we needed to say and there is relief that comes with that.